Hang in there … it’s almost over!!

Well, hey, friends and neighborinos! Welcome aboard! Glad to have you around for this, the penultimate Blog Before The Election! And this election especially makes us SO happy to be Americans, doesn’t it? Er … show of hands? Anyone?

Well, I don’t think it’s QUITE that bad, Your Highness! Still happy to have those free elections, not being required to join the Church of England, etc.!

Still, it’s a stressful time for a lot of people, so with that in mind, let’s just get this out of the WEIGH, shall we? (get it? WEIGH?)

Er anyway, without further adieux (hee hee!), it’s

197.2

And boy howdy, it’s nice to see them numbers headin’ downwards for a change, ain’t it? We’ll see if it lasts during the next few nail-biting days!

Meanwhile, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention that tomorrow is my hubby’s birthday, so happy birthday, Mr. 50by60! Lookin’ good there!

Oh, and just FYI, this year Mr. 50 and I are on opposite sides of the political spectrum, which sounds bad, but look at it this way — when all the dust settles and we figure out who won, 50% of our household will be celebrating.

So whatever side of the political divide YOU’RE on, rest assured you’ll still be welcome here next week! If you’re happy, great! If you’re not, well …

And remember, we have to go through this again in four years, so ya better start preparing yourself now!

See you next week and remember, no matter WHO wins or loses, count them calories — it’s the only WEIGH!!

Oh well, at least fat isn’t contagious!

This will be short – I’m running late!

Sorry to report this, but my weight

is UP a bit, to:

198.8

Still, there’s one thought that gives me relief:

I’m not contagious – so I can’t cause grief, like, oh, I dunno …

(Sorry for the short post — hope you have a great week!)

Post-Debate Special: More Uses for Plain Greek Yogurt!

Yes, yes, I’m sure we all enjoyed watched that exciting, never-a-dull-moment debate last night!!

The debate, in a nutshell! nyuk nyuk!

and we’re all ready for more excitement this morning, so with that thought in mind, let’s get right to the Rhymin’ Weekly Weigh-In!

Today’s weigh-in:

Hey, that’s okay, I’ll take “same” instead of “gain” any day of the week!

Sure, or even Tuesday Weld, who was wayyyy before your time, but y’know, anything for a laugh, right?

And since that’s as political as I really want to get today, let’s focus on something REALLY important: more uses for plain Greek yogurt!

Obi Wan is right — there’s TONS (or ‘tonnes’ for my British/Canadian/lousy speller friends!) of uses for that weird tasting plain yogurt besides dumping Ranch Dressing powder in it, like I suggested last week! Here’s just a few, just off the top of my head:

  1. Use instead of mayonnaise or sour cream in pretty much ANYTHING. I love to make tuna salad with mayo or sour cream, but the calories, eek! So just use a couple of spoonfuls of plain yogurt instead, then sprinkle on your onion salt, celery salt, and/or whatever you like to put in your tuna salad.
  2. Mix in some raisins. I get those big bags of cute little 45-calorie boxes of raisins, and dump them into salads, yogurts, etc. An 80-calorie yogurt with a 45-calorie box of raisins is, er, let’s see …

… well, anyway, it’s less than 150 calories, that’s for sure! Which is pretty sweet for a breakfast treat!

3. Mix in pretty much any other kind of fruit! Blueberries, strawberries, etc. – whatever you like!

4. Add a little sugar. Yes, real sugar! One teaspoon is 15 calories, so sprinkle that in, add a dab of vanilla extract, and voila, you’ve got a yummy vanilla yogurt for less than 100 calories!

Oh all right, enough with the math! Listen, if you want more ideas for plain Yogurt, here’s a great article at Today.com with way more (and better) suggestions for you to peruse: Yogurt is not just for breakfast! 53 ways to use this magical ingredients

Enjoy — and let me know what you think, in the comments! Did author Karen B. Gibbs cover your favorite idea, or do you want to add a #54?? Go for it, and I’ll highlight your ideas in NEXT week’s post!

Have a great week!

If It’s Wednesday, It Must Not Be Belgium

Some people have asked why I don’t give as much attention to making fun of Joe Biden as I do of our current Infector in Chief.



Hey listen, as soon as he’s safely ensconced in the Casa Blanca, and Donnie’s back in Florida walking around in his Crocs, I’ll gladly indulge in some Hair Sniffer in Chief memes!



Till then, though, I just want to focus on two things:

1. getting my ballot(s) in as early as possible,

and

2. fer cryin’ out loud, counting my calories! I keep SAYING I’m going to, but then I DON’T …



Sigh! Well, maybe if I keep SAYING it, once in a while, I’ll actually DO it! Let’s see if I can do that enough times during the next week to have a loss, shall we? Because if I keep having weigh-ins like this:

199.0

nobody’s gonna be happy! 

Thanks, ex-Prez! Meanwhile, let’s just get on out there in the 150-degree temperature and do a little exercise, shall we? See ya next week!!

Back from the cliff, plus my Potted Plants of Politics theory!

Well, I was all set to tell you a sad story about how it had finally happened — it’d been pretty obvious for a while, like the proverbial roaring freight train. 



No, no, THAT’S not what I was talking about! It’s my weight! I was all set to reveal that I’d gone over the 200-pound cliff and was ready to soldier on and fight the good fight and all that happy crappy stuff. But good news, I don’t have to!

198.6

And congrats, Ms. Harris! You might not have been my first pick, but as I’ve opined recently, you and Crazy Joe are basically the proverbial Potted Plant so many of us are willing to vote for at this point.



Funny thing is, now that I muse on it, Trump was kinda the Potted Plant of 2016, wasn’t he? Lots of Democrats and “undecideds” decided they’d rather have ABC (Anyone But Clinton), and since Trump was definitely Anyone…



he was pretty much the only option for keeping Gropin’ Bill Clinton out of the Oval Office.



But sooner or later, every potted plant starts to go bad (at least, all the ones I’VE ever been responsible for!). So this time, yeah, Biden’s pretty much the designated Potted Plant of 2020.



Which might not be a campaign slogan he’d appreciate, but what the hell, he’s got my vote anyway. As for Kamala, I’ll be honest — I didn’t really care for her till a few months ago, when I heard her interviewed by Will Farrell on “The Ron Burgundy Podcast.”

https://app.stitcher.com/splayer/f/364891/63078906

And as one of my favorite cousins pointed out (hi Laura!*), that means we’ll get a whole lot more Maya Rudolph, yay!

I’ve got a soft spot for people who make me laugh, which is probably why I voted for Trump — let’s be honest, the man used to be an entertainer, after all! And y’know, you get what you pay for in this life.

But now, unfortunately, the laugh’s on US, so I say it’s time for a change — not just in the White House, but in my diet!



Yeah, it’s taking a lot of effort to turn this caboose around, but we’ll do it! Trust me — have I ever lied to you?



Never mind! Anyway, calorie counting works, so I’ll definitely be hoping for another happy loss next week (as well as one in November, nyuk nyuk!)!

(*and hi Margaret, and hi Garold! Don’t worry, you’ll get your moments in the sun at some point!)

Some common sense, for the butt-hurt amongst you

Okay, before I dive into yet another “Mildly Controversial” post, let me share some GREAT news with you — my weigh-in!

195.8

Yay, finally!! And if anyone ever tells you writing down your calories every day doesn’t make any difference, send ’em to me.

Now for the controversial part! Apparently a bunch of you (I’m using “you” generically, not talking about you specifically, MOM!!) are getting all upset because your favorite racist food names and/or logos are being retired, because … you know … they’re RACIST!!

And really, I kinda feel like I shouldn’t have to say this, but if you’re reading this, you’re a dieter, right? So you ought to know already that most of the crap Big Food pretends is “food” is really just a big glob of high-fructose corn syrup mixed with way too much sodium and way too little nutritional value, right?

What I’m trying to convey to you is that if you’re all butt-hurt because Aunt Jemima, Uncle Ben, and Eskimo Pie are changing their names, you really need to get a grip on reality.

If it’s too hard for you, let me “blogger-splain” it to you.

These names and logos are based on racial stereotypes. We, as a society, in this year of our Lord 2020 A.D., have finally started to realize that. And the businesses that make all our Taste O’Crap and CrapTastic Brand Kwality Food Products are finally allowing themselves to be dragged, kicking and screaming all the way, into the 21st century, where we’re supposed to be treating each other as equals.

So they’re changing the NAMES and the LOGOS. But they’re NOT changing the FOODS!! You’ll still be able to suck on your Crap On A Stick or pour Fake “Maypel” Syrup on your plastic-enhanced waffles, if you so choose!

You just won’t be able to do it while gazing lovingly at a name and/or logo that was most likely inspired by a minstrel show!

And frankly, if you’re reading this blog, you should know better than to be eating all that fake stuff, anyway! What’s wrong with REAL maple syrup, anyway? They do still make it, you know!

So untwist your panties and stop doing your bad Archie Bunker imitations, ‘kay? ‘Cause that, my friends, is no longer kosher (if it ever was)!

Whew — all that righteous indignation is makin’ me hungry! Tell you what — next week I’ll share a couple of easy breakfast ideas that you can make with at least 50 percent REAL food! Meantime, have a great week! Oh, and by the way:

Confessions of a Karen

Welp, the weight’s pretty much the same (you can see it in the sidebar if you really need to!), so I thought I’d just share a few thoughts I’ve had over the past few days. Thoughts about a person you may have heard a lot about lately. That’s right: KAREN!

By now, you’ve probably heard the term “Karen” applied to a certain type of woman, almost always white, giving in to what seems to HER to be “righteous anger,” but to everyone else, just sheer nuttiness at best, and outright racism at worst. (And btw, for those who think “Karen” is sexist, there are DEFINITELY male versions!)

So I’ve been watching those videos and reading first-person accounts of people who’ve survived close encounters with an angry Karen, such as birdwatcher Christian Cooper’s disturbing run-in with Amy Cooper, with a growing sense of unease, and finally realized today that the reason I feel so uncomfortable is that I’m seeing MYSELF in that Karen mirror!

I mean, I’ve never called 911 on anyone, but I’ve definitely gotten angry with people for (just as an example) parking in “my” space in front of our house.

I mean, you know, it’s not actually *marked* in any way, shape or form as my space, and (true confession!) I myself have parked in front of OTHER people’s houses. And yet, I still feel this sense of entitled rage bubbling up from inside. “How dare they take something that belongs to ME? or do something that *I* feel is incorrect? or [worst case Karen scenario] be somewhere that *I* don’t think they belong?”

Most of the time, I’ve managed to keep my inner Karen at bay, kinda like Good Janet facing off against Bad Janet.

And as I said, I’ve never called 911 on anyone — but I sure do realize now that there’ve been times when I *wanted* to, for all the WRONG reasons that those other Karens have done.

So, what now? Maybe Lucy was right, all those years ago:

Maybe the next step is to be more aware of situations where my inner “Bad Karen” might decide to make an appearance, and try to defuse them before they go any further than my own mind, perhaps by channeling GOOD Karen, you know, the one who sang all those pretty songs.

Or perhaps just walk away from the situation, reminding myself of what all Karens seem to forget: WE’RE NOT THE POLICE!

And (SPOILER ALERT!) if there’s one thing I learned from binge-watching “The Good Place,” it’s that even the worst of us can improve!

Even Bad Janet became Somewhat Better Janet, in the end.

 So it’s not impossible that “Karens” can improve as well, if we’re willing to take responsibility for our actions!

Well, if you won’t, I will! Anybody else? 

It’s gonna be a lot of work — and it’s not gonna be easy. But it needs to be done. Just like (circling back to the main topic of this blog!) I need to start working on my diet!

But we’ll worry about that NEXT week. Meantime, take care of yourself and those you care about/for!

What year is it again?

What a week, huh? Seems like every time we start to relax, 2020 throws us another curve ball!

And sure, we could probably get through it if we just had some calm, sensible, reassuring leadership, either now or in the foreseeable future!

Yikes! Well, obviously we don’t, so I for one don’t feel inclined to get too excited about my weight loss, or lack thereof! Which brings me to the weigh-in:

198.0

which, all things considered, isn’t really that big a deal! After all, while I haven’t lost, I haven’t gained, either. And since losing seems to be the order of the day right now, I suspect I’m in good company!

(Although, in a twisted sort of way, he’s actually accomplishing quite a lot!)

But of course, as I’ve often said, this is a weight-loss blog, not a political one, so whether you support the Trumpster or the Hair Sniffer, you’re welcome here! Just be aware that I do have my opinions, and occasionally need to get them out in the open!

Well, since I’m paying $50 buckaroonies a year for the privilege of this WordPress blog, I’m darn tootin’ gonna have my say, so there, David!! Anyway, that’s the weigh-in! Hopefully by next week, the world will have calmed down a bit and it’ll stop looking like the ’60s are making a comeback!

See ya then, unless … well, let’s just keep the positive thoughts, shall we?

 

Kahlua-fueled hangover Wednesday!

Well, good morning, campers, rise and shine! Time to put your booties on, ’cause it’s cold out there!

Oh, uh, actually, it’s pretty warm out there — supposed to get up to 90 degrees Fahrenheit here in beautiful (finally!) sunny Southern California

And I for one welcome our new Sun overlord! As I may or may not have mentioned, I have a mild form of S.A.D. (Seasonal Affective Disorder), which basically means, “Cloudy days = SAD, sunny days = HAPPY!”

So today’s gonna be happy — er, once I get over that hangover (see post title!).

See, yesterday, Mr. 50by60 and I celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary.

And of course, part of that celebration involved the ingestion of alcoholic fluids — in my case, Kahlua! I always think the “coffee” part will balance out the “alcohol” part. Well, guess what?

Yup — I woke up this morning with a mild, but very noticeable, hangover! Thanks to some very strong (non-alcoholic!) cofveve, though, it’s finally receded just enough that I can sit here and write this scintillatingly witty blog post, for your entertainment!

Anyhoo, it made me wonder — you know how some superstitious people think 13 is an unlucky number?

Well, given that we’re only about a third of the way through 2020, the Year Everything Went Wonky, or YEWW …

… I’m wondering if maybe us having our 13th is just contributing, numerologically speaking, to the whole general YEWWiness of this sucky time! If so, let me be the first to offer my heartfelt apologies!

Hopefully, by the time our 14th rolls around, everything will be hunky dory and back to semi-normal! Meanwhile, hope YOUR week has been going well! Stay safe, be happy, and I’ll see ya next week!

State of the Weight!!

Well, good morning, everyone! I’m sure we all enjoyed last night’s State of the Union address, featuring President Trump, a frequent visitor to my meme gallery, and a couple of newbies

Of course, not everyone enjoyed it:

But ya know, you can’t please everyone! So on that note, let’s check out the State of the Weight, shall we?

193.4

Hey, not too shabby! I mean, I’d rather it was a LOT lower, but I’m fine with it just going down in dribs & drabs, right? As long as it’s down, not up!

So unless you’re in Iowa,

get ready to MAKE A DIFFERENCE for your country! Meanwhile, don’t rip up that diet plan just yet, Nancy!

I’m sure it’s chock-full of great weight loss ideas from our beloved Prez!

So let’s give it a try, and meet back here again NEXT week — whaddya say?

OK, well, the REST of us will be here, David! Have a great week, everyone!