So long, sucky year!

Hey, everyone! Just wanted to get in one last post before this annus horribilus comes to an end. And let’s be honest, 2021 may wind up having a lot of sucky things in it too, but at least it’ll look a little different, in some places!

And in a few short weeks, we’ll have a new President (fingers and toes crossed!), which means I’ll have to come up with a whole new slew of memes!

But most importantly, as far as this blog is concerned, I’ll be starting my Weekly Weigh-Ins again, and we can (hopefully) start sending those numbers downward again!

Well, no, I think those of us who’ve reached this magical thing called “middle age” (and yes, I AM planning to live to be 125, so shut it!) know that at this point, we’re pretty much stuck with the “ME” we’ve been living with most of our lives (except for those magical years when we traveled with the Doctor in the Tardis, but since that’s been wiped from our memory, it doesn’t bother us too much anymore).

New “Doctor Who” on New Year’s Day! (Donna still hasn’t watched any)

So ENJOY your last week of Holiday Diet Break, everyone! We’ll start counting the calories NEXT week, okay? Meanwhile, SEE YA NEXT YEAR!!

We still miss you, Gilda!

Time for a Thanksgiving Blogging Break!!

Good morning, everyone! Since one turkey has been pardoned this week …

and since Thanksgiving 2020 looks to be, well, pretty much the way the rest of 2020 has been around the country …

I, for one, am MORE than ready to take my annual Holiday Diet Break!!

Of course, I may still check in from time to time here, even if I don’t post my weight stats till after January 1st, ’cause you never know what’s next in this crazy year!

Meanwhile, let me just wish all my loyal readers (you, and you, and, um, let’s see, oh yeah, you, I guess) a very happy Thanksgiving — you are hereby REPRIEVED from your dieting duties (temporarily anyway!)!

Oh, and P.S. (’cause I just HAVE to get one last one in!) —

Never, Ever Give Up! (unless you lost, duh)

So last week there was this election, and after all the dust settled and the votes were counted (even the “legal” ones), we have a new Hair Sniffer in Chief!

But in case you hadn’t heard, the currently reigning Infector in Chief has, so far, refused to concede.

And you can’t blame him — I mean, what with all the accusations of voter fraud out there. Sure, pretty much all of them are based on hearsay and unfounded assertions, but there’s gotta be SOMETHING, right?

Well, it’s all a tempest in a teapot, but if there’s one thing I agree with Current Prez about, it’s that there are some battles that are so important you just can’t bring yourself to lose gracefully.

No, you go down fighting! And that’s how it is with me and the Battle of the Bulge! Yes, my weight has been pushing slowly upwards, ever upwards, for months now —

— and sure, today’s weight is a tad up, again —

198.8

— but as we all learned from that fine documentary series, The Office:

And y/know, Michael Scott was right! As long as I can afford to pay for this verkakte blog which, yes, I actually have to pay a yearly stipend for it because SOMEBODY didn’t think to include “free blog sites” in any of their stimulus packages —

— I’ll keep counting the calories and hoping for the best! Meantime, let’s continue to hope that as we edge closer, ever closer, to that Big Giant Holiday Season,

I’ll be able to at least hold the fat at bay, long enough to get to the ever-popular New Year’s Resolution, which in 2021 is probably going to be something like:

Meanwhile, have a great week, and remember, count every calorie!!

(Oh and by the way, a HAPPY VETERAN’S DAY to all youse guys and gals!)

Post-Debate Special: More Uses for Plain Greek Yogurt!

Yes, yes, I’m sure we all enjoyed watched that exciting, never-a-dull-moment debate last night!!

The debate, in a nutshell! nyuk nyuk!

and we’re all ready for more excitement this morning, so with that thought in mind, let’s get right to the Rhymin’ Weekly Weigh-In!

Today’s weigh-in:

Hey, that’s okay, I’ll take “same” instead of “gain” any day of the week!

Sure, or even Tuesday Weld, who was wayyyy before your time, but y’know, anything for a laugh, right?

And since that’s as political as I really want to get today, let’s focus on something REALLY important: more uses for plain Greek yogurt!

Obi Wan is right — there’s TONS (or ‘tonnes’ for my British/Canadian/lousy speller friends!) of uses for that weird tasting plain yogurt besides dumping Ranch Dressing powder in it, like I suggested last week! Here’s just a few, just off the top of my head:

  1. Use instead of mayonnaise or sour cream in pretty much ANYTHING. I love to make tuna salad with mayo or sour cream, but the calories, eek! So just use a couple of spoonfuls of plain yogurt instead, then sprinkle on your onion salt, celery salt, and/or whatever you like to put in your tuna salad.
  2. Mix in some raisins. I get those big bags of cute little 45-calorie boxes of raisins, and dump them into salads, yogurts, etc. An 80-calorie yogurt with a 45-calorie box of raisins is, er, let’s see …

… well, anyway, it’s less than 150 calories, that’s for sure! Which is pretty sweet for a breakfast treat!

3. Mix in pretty much any other kind of fruit! Blueberries, strawberries, etc. – whatever you like!

4. Add a little sugar. Yes, real sugar! One teaspoon is 15 calories, so sprinkle that in, add a dab of vanilla extract, and voila, you’ve got a yummy vanilla yogurt for less than 100 calories!

Oh all right, enough with the math! Listen, if you want more ideas for plain Yogurt, here’s a great article at Today.com with way more (and better) suggestions for you to peruse: Yogurt is not just for breakfast! 53 ways to use this magical ingredients

Enjoy — and let me know what you think, in the comments! Did author Karen B. Gibbs cover your favorite idea, or do you want to add a #54?? Go for it, and I’ll highlight your ideas in NEXT week’s post!

Have a great week!

If It’s Wednesday, It Must Not Be Belgium

Some people have asked why I don’t give as much attention to making fun of Joe Biden as I do of our current Infector in Chief.



Hey listen, as soon as he’s safely ensconced in the Casa Blanca, and Donnie’s back in Florida walking around in his Crocs, I’ll gladly indulge in some Hair Sniffer in Chief memes!



Till then, though, I just want to focus on two things:

1. getting my ballot(s) in as early as possible,

and

2. fer cryin’ out loud, counting my calories! I keep SAYING I’m going to, but then I DON’T …



Sigh! Well, maybe if I keep SAYING it, once in a while, I’ll actually DO it! Let’s see if I can do that enough times during the next week to have a loss, shall we? Because if I keep having weigh-ins like this:

199.0

nobody’s gonna be happy! 

Thanks, ex-Prez! Meanwhile, let’s just get on out there in the 150-degree temperature and do a little exercise, shall we? See ya next week!!

Back from the cliff, plus my Potted Plants of Politics theory!

Well, I was all set to tell you a sad story about how it had finally happened — it’d been pretty obvious for a while, like the proverbial roaring freight train. 



No, no, THAT’S not what I was talking about! It’s my weight! I was all set to reveal that I’d gone over the 200-pound cliff and was ready to soldier on and fight the good fight and all that happy crappy stuff. But good news, I don’t have to!

198.6

And congrats, Ms. Harris! You might not have been my first pick, but as I’ve opined recently, you and Crazy Joe are basically the proverbial Potted Plant so many of us are willing to vote for at this point.



Funny thing is, now that I muse on it, Trump was kinda the Potted Plant of 2016, wasn’t he? Lots of Democrats and “undecideds” decided they’d rather have ABC (Anyone But Clinton), and since Trump was definitely Anyone…



he was pretty much the only option for keeping Gropin’ Bill Clinton out of the Oval Office.



But sooner or later, every potted plant starts to go bad (at least, all the ones I’VE ever been responsible for!). So this time, yeah, Biden’s pretty much the designated Potted Plant of 2020.



Which might not be a campaign slogan he’d appreciate, but what the hell, he’s got my vote anyway. As for Kamala, I’ll be honest — I didn’t really care for her till a few months ago, when I heard her interviewed by Will Farrell on “The Ron Burgundy Podcast.”

https://app.stitcher.com/splayer/f/364891/63078906

And as one of my favorite cousins pointed out (hi Laura!*), that means we’ll get a whole lot more Maya Rudolph, yay!

I’ve got a soft spot for people who make me laugh, which is probably why I voted for Trump — let’s be honest, the man used to be an entertainer, after all! And y’know, you get what you pay for in this life.

But now, unfortunately, the laugh’s on US, so I say it’s time for a change — not just in the White House, but in my diet!



Yeah, it’s taking a lot of effort to turn this caboose around, but we’ll do it! Trust me — have I ever lied to you?



Never mind! Anyway, calorie counting works, so I’ll definitely be hoping for another happy loss next week (as well as one in November, nyuk nyuk!)!

(*and hi Margaret, and hi Garold! Don’t worry, you’ll get your moments in the sun at some point!)